I Broke it!!

– and I don’t mean another bone, thankfully!

  I weighed in this morning and I’ve finally broke through!  After 9 weeks of hanging around the same weight, gaining a little and losing a little, I’ve finally got through it.  I was beginning to wonder.  My motivation was starting to really waver.  But today, going in there and seeing those numbers made all the difference in the world.  I feel ultra-confident again!

Maybe I’ll be able to lose 4 more pounds over the next two weeks and meet my goal by Thanksgiving.  I’m really going to try hard.  It just gets so much harder to lose the further I get into this thing.  I’ll get there though.

Thunder and Lightening

Big congrats to by BG1 for coming in second in her cheer competition today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    This pic is from a competition last year, but they have the same uniform and such.  I don’t have any of the pics from today yet.

They had a pretty rough year last year in competitions.  We were all so nervous today about going in.  I just felt like it was going to set the tone for the whole year.  It’s hard to get excited sometimes when you’re up against such great teams and you walk away empty handed.  They always have a great time and wouldn’t DREAM of quitting, but it’s nice to place every once in a while!

So today, they went in, a little scared …. and totally pulled off their routine!  They looked so good out there.  I’m proud of her and the entire team for doing their very best Hard work does pay off!

For those of you who don’t know about the Thunder and Lightening part…. it’s part of their cheer … being the Twisters and all

GREAT JOB GIRLS AND GUYS!

Catching Up with Coley

Thanks so much to Coley for these awards.  Sorry it’s taken me so long to get everything together so I could reply!

Answers:

1. Where is your cell phone? — somewhere
2. Your hair?  — messy
3. Your mother?  — kind
4. Your father?  — strong
5. Your favorite food?  — chinese
6. Your dream last night? — teaching
7. Your favorite drink?  — Coke Zero
8. Your dream/goal?  — health
9. What room are you in?  — livingroom
10. Your hobby?  — scrapbooking
11. Your fear?  — failure
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? — Hawaii
13. Where were you last night?  — home
14. Something that you aren’t?  — lazy
15. Muffins?  — no
16. Wish list item? — Kindle
17. Where did you grow up?  — Tennessee
18. Last think you did?  — yawn
19. What are you wearing?  — sweats
20. Your TV?  — OFF!
21. Your pets?  — cats
22. Friends?  — caring
23. Your life?  — ordinary
24. Your mood?  — peaceful
25. Missing someone?  — nah
26. Vehicle?  — SUV
27. Something you’re not wearing?  — glasses
28. Your favorite store?  — unsure
29. Your favorite color?  — orange
30. When was the last time you laughed?  — today
31. Last time you cried?  — yesterday
32. Your best friend?  — timeless
33. One place that I go over and over?  — gym
34. One person who emails me regularly?  — Carla
35. Favorite place to eat?  — Red Lobster

Ok … so now to pass this on to 6 others….One word answers and pass it on to 6 more

1. Betty
2. Spoogie
3. Steph
4. Renae
5. Janie

—- Sadly, that’s all the bloggers I know!!!!  So if I stumble upon another one, I’ll be sure to finish this up.

 

And thanks again, Coley, for this award…. 

I have it posted proudly to the side.  Thanks for all your motivation and support!  You rock girl!!!

I’m passing the award on to the above mentioned bloggers as well. 

 

More Foot Woes

I repeated my x-ray today.  It’s been 3 weeks and there’s not much sign of healing.  It actually looks a little worse, to be honest.  There’s a slightly larger gap between the bones than with the first x-ray.

I guess I’m going to have to stop cardio altogether for a while if I want to have any results.  I really worry about the impact this is going to have.  I guess I could just do weight training for a while….. I’ll just have to be a lot more careful about my nutrition though.

I absolutely cannot let this get me down.  I have to stop being stubborn and do what I know I’m supposed to do or else I’m going to end up out of commission for a lot longer than I bargained for. 

Sheesh…I hate just sitting around and waiting on this stupid thing to heal.  I really have to wonder how long it’s been broken though, especially since it’s been hurting so long.  Looking back, I probably broke it when I stepped in that hole back in July.  It’s really been hurting since then.  I may end up going to see an ortho…. maybe I should.  But then, they’d probably do the same thing I’m doing…  that and tell me to stay off of it

Hey there, remember me?

I know it’s been absolutely forever since I’ve posted on here.  I know I keep saying I’ll keep up with it better.  I try, but then ….. same old song and dance I guess.

Truth of the matter is, I’m stuck here.  Sitting here at this plateau.  Waiting for a break through.  Getting discouraged.  Trying not to.  Trying to hang on.   Holding by a thread. 

I broke my foot a few weeks ago.  It was a real blow to this whole thing.  I’ve been working out still, doing upper body with my weights and getting cardio in with the rowing machine and stationary bike.  Eating has been … eh… ok.  I’ve done ok for the most part.  I’ve had a few cheat days, more than I’d like to count. … but overall, just ok.

I know I could break through if I would just do what I did in the beginning.  I know it would happen.  I have got to find a way to get my motivation back.  I need the drive that I had when I first started.  Gotta find it somehow. 

I’m just tired of these injuries setting me back.  I hurt my shoulder probably about 2-3 months ago and it’s not much better.  I’ve had steroid injections and everything, but it’s just still hurting.  Probably a result of over training and trying to do too much before I’m ready.  On the one hand, I need to be more aware of my limitations, but on the other hand, I need something to push me harder.  It’s just such a hard place to be in.

Plus, lately when I look in the mirror, I still see the old 300 pound me looking back at me.  I know I’ve mentioned it before, but she’s plaguing me more lately.  It’s like she’s hanging around, just waiting to be back in my life….to be me again.  I feel haunted by her somehow.  There’s this nagging voice in my head telling me that she’ll be back…..that I was just born to be fat.  I hate her.  I hate everything I was when I was her.  I was so weak…so depressed….so out of control of my own actions.  But there she is, every morning, looking at me.

Sure, it would be easy to just give in…give up, eat what I want, not go to the gym, not have this stupid pain from over doing it.  But what would that mean?  It would mean me giving up on myself.  It would mean not giving myself a chance to be the best person I can be.  It would mean ultimately a shorter life most likely….medications for blood pressure possibly…type two diabetes possibly….everything I don’t want.  Easy is never better.  Taking the easy way out is just exactly that….taking an out.  It’s something I can never do.  So somehow I have to break through this….make my way out….find some motivation….do something….

somehow